“Many of life’s failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.”
– Thomas Edison
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December 31st
“Only one more day,” she said. “Tonight will be fun, of course, but tomorrow, I will become a fitter, healthier, more productive version of myself.”
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January 1st
“Ah, the start of a new year—the ultimate fresh start. I am in control. “
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January 2nd – February 27th
“Ugh, where did I go wrong? I haven’t kept up with my goals since mid-January! I don’t know what I’m doing. Did I lie to myself, thinking I could do all this?! I must be the type of person who cannot make big changes all at once. Maybe I’ll try again next year.”
Despite the “cheesiness” of the monologue above, those words are spoken out of the best of intentions. You know as well as I do that intending to do something is not the same as actually doing it.
Not to mention, you can’t “become” something overnight. The word “become” means to “grow or come to be.” It takes time.
I think many of us (myself included) can be over-ambitious and under-realistic when it comes to resolving to change our old habits into new and better habits. We have these grand dreams, but do we write them down to turn them from fleeting wishes into achievable goals? Do we break them down into the necessary steps in order to actually accomplish them?
In other words, did you make an official resolution, or did you make a wish, hoping for the best without actually creating a strategy for implementation?
Perhaps this is why many New Year’s resolutions don’t make it past February. In fact, there’s an actual day called Quitter’s Day—the second Friday of January—when resolution drop-off rates peak (Strava).
There’s good news, though!
1) You’re not alone.
2) Understanding why most resolutions fail can help you beat the odds.
Let’s break down the typical resolution journey and how you can get back on track, even now, at the end of February.
The Typical Timeline of Resolution Failure
Week 1-2: The Honeymoon Phase
The first two weeks of January are filled with enthusiasm, driven by what researchers call the “fresh start effect” (Dai et al.). It’s that refreshing feeling of wiping the slate clean and starting anew.
• Gym memberships skyrocket. Meal prep is spot on. Meditation apps get downloaded (whether they get used is another story).
• Social media posts are buzzingwith #NewYearNewMe declarations, providing a boost of external motivation.
• Everything feels possible—until we come off the high of the holiday season, and our old ways sneak back into our lives.
Week 3-4: The Motivation Slump
This is where things get tricky. By January 19th—aka Quitter’s Day—most people have hit their first wall (Strava).
• The novelty wears off, and other life obligations take center stage.
• You’re not seeing results yet, which can be discouraging.
• The brain craves instant gratification, making it harder to push through the discomfort of slow progress.
Sound familiar? Hang in there—because February is when things reallystart to make or break your resolution.
February & Beyond: The Resolution Graveyard
By mid-February, a staggering 80% of resolutions have been abandoned(U.S. News & World Report).
The problem? Most people never get past the habit-building stage (Clear).
Why?
• Without a strategic system, old habits creep back in, and willpower alone is often insufficient.
• Life happens—work, stress, family demands—and suddenly, that 5 AM workout doesn’t seem so exciting or important anymore.
If you’re thinking about throwing in the towel, or you have already, learn why you and others like you quit their New Year’s resolutions and get ready to change how you approach your resolutions moving forward.
Why Do People Fail? (Scientific Insights)
✔ Unrealistic Goals – A study by Norcross et al. found that setting overly ambitious goals drastically reduces the chances of success. If you resolve to go from zero workouts to six per week, you might be setting yourself up for burnout. Small, sustainable steps are the key to long-term formation.
✔ Lack of Habit Formation – Research shows that, on average, it takes 66 days to form a habit—not 21, as commonly believed (Lally et al.). If you’re expecting instant habit transformation, you’re likely to feel
frustrated. Like the tide, building new habits is a process of ebb and flow. Sometimes, we accomplish our new habit 3 days in a row, only to drop the ball on days 4 and 5 and pick it back up again a week later. Building a new habit is a marathon, not a sprint. Keep going.
✔ Motivation vs. Discipline – Motivation is fleeting, and successful people rely on systems, not willpower (Duhigg). Create a system for yourself so when, not if, your motivation dips, you can get back to the task at hand as soon as possible.
This is great to know, but as we are all too familiar with, knowing is not the same as doing. How can we expect to build new habits, develop new routines, and actually implement them? Let’s talk strategy.
Strategies for Staying Committed to Your Resolutions (Backed by Research)
✅ Remember Your Why – Start with ‘why,’ not ‘what.’ (Sinek). Why did you come up with these goals in the first place? Keeping this thought front and center of your mind will help you stay disciplined when the motivation ebbs.
✅ Set SMART Goals – Instead of vague resolutions like “get fit,” go for Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, and Time-bound goals (Doran). Example: “I will strength train for 30 minutes thrice weekly.” Then, plan out in your calendar which 3 days of the week you will do this. If you declare you will go Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, and something comes up on a Wednesday, you can go Thursday, Saturday, or Sunday, and you will have still met your thrice weekly goal.
✅ Focus on Identity Change – Instead of saying, “I want to lose weight,” shift your mindset to “I am a person who makes healthy choices.” Identity-based goals lead to long-term behavioral change (Clear).
✅ Use Habit Stacking – Tie a new habit to an existing one (Fogg). Example: “After I brush my teeth, I will do 10 squats.” This makes new habits easier to adopt. Or, you can do 10 squats while brushing your teeth.
✅ Accountability Matters – A study by the Dominican University found that people are 42% more likely to achieve goals when they write them down and have an accountability partner. So, tell someone your goal—or better yet, join a group challenge (like the one we’re launching in March! Join our email list now to be notified when sign-ups open).
✅ Expect Obstacles – I was telling my mom the other day that I have to have a plan just to deviate from it. If I have a plan, I don’t always stick with it. However, I accomplish everything I need to accomplish. When I don’t have a plan, I don’t accomplish much, and I feel like I wander around aimlessly, trying to figure out what to do next. Then, when something unexpected comes up, I can’t get back on track because I was not on any track to begin with.
Don’t just hope for the best—prepare for setbacks.
Example: If stress eating is a challenge for you, create a plan: “If I feel stressed, I will take a 10-minute walk instead of reaching for snacks.”Having a backup plan keeps you from spiraling.
Don’t Give Up, Instead Get Smart About Building Healthy Habits
Resolutions don’t fail because people aren’t trying hard enough. They fail because they’re built on fleeting motivation instead of sustainable habits.
So, instead of giving up when things get tough, pivot. Adjust your goals, reinforce your habits, and, most importantly—be patient with yourself. Progress is not linear, and every small step counts, even the ones you cannot see, especially the ones you cannot see.
Starting today, challenge yourself to stick with your goals using these research-backed strategies. And if you need a little extra support, find a community or accountability partner to help you stay on track (join the list now to be notified when sign-ups happen)!
You’ve got this. 💪
I believe in you. Keep fighting the good fight.
References
Clear, James. Atomic Habits. Penguin, 2018.
Dai, H., et al. “APA PsycNET.” The Charleston Advisor, no. 1, The Charleston Co., July 2012, pp. 16–19. Crossref, doi:10.5260/chara.14.1.16.
Duhigg, Charles. The Power of Habit. Random House, 2012.
Fogg, B. J. Tiny Habits. Harvest, 2020.
Sinek, Simon. Start with Why. Penguin, 2011.
Matthews, Dr. Gail. Study on Goal Achievement. Dominican University of California, 2007.
Doran, G. T. (1981). There’s a S.M.A.R.T. way to write management’s goals and objectives. Management Review, 70(11), 35-36.
Lally, P., Van Jaarsveld, C. H. M., Potts, H. W. W., & Wardle, J. (2009). How are habits formed: Modelling habit formation in the real world. European Journal of Social Psychology, 40(6), 998-1009.
Norcross, J. C., Mrykalo, M. S., & Blagys, M. D. (2002). Auld Lang Syne: Success predictors, change processes, and self-reported outcomes of New Year’s resolvers and nonresolvers. Journal of Clinical Psychology, 58(4), 397-405.
Strava. (2020). Strava’s Year in Sport: The Day Most People Quit Their New Year’s Resolutions. Industry Report.Retrieved from Strava.com
U.S. News & World Report. (n.d.). Why 80% of New Year’s Resolutions Fail.News Article. Retrieved from usnews.com